I felt like this post was much needed. I have a birthday coming up, and you know when you start getting older your parents and people in general go from “You’re not ready to date” to “When exactly are you going to start dating?” Annoying to the highest extent.
Below are 8 reasons I am single and don’t mind one bit; cross my heart.
1) I’m in my 20s. I don’t have to be committed if I don’t want to be. Stop interrogating me.
2) I’m purposely not approachable to the opposite sex. Calm your tits, I’m straight as a pin. I purposely set my demeanor as unavailable because I’m genuinely not looking. If love finds me, then damnit, but I do not go to singles gatherings, hesitant to give out my number/ go on casual dates, and I don’t read into compliments. I take them platonically and keep it pushing.
3) Just landed the perfect job for a free spirit in their 20s. I just got hired as a flight attendant, however I haven’t received my official wings yet, until I pass training. I don’t want any distractions. I lose focus easily in relationships. Also I’m going to be doing a ton of traveling and I have trust issues. Lastly, I don’t want to feel used for traveling perks. I’m already starting to feel used and I’m not even official yet.
4) I never wanted to get married in my 20s. EVER. I will however accept a proposal if God happens to plan my life that way, and everything feels right. Other than that, I am not interested in heavy commitment in my 20s.
5) I’m a late bloomer. Some of the things some of you were doing at 16, I wasn’t until 19, 20. Let me continue to take my time please.
6) If I commit young I will rebel. I know if I causally glide through my youth, then at 30 I would have little “what-ifs”. I will be able to dedicate my time fully to my husband and family. My mom, although beyond awesome, got pregnant with me at 16, had me at 17, got married at 19 and so I watched her dishearteningly try to relive her 20s .
7) To prove a point. My mom was married at 19, my stepmom at 24, and my brother at 19., all for a common reason (a kid). I don’t fall into that category, so why tie myself to someone if I don’t necessarily have to. I have the whole rest of my life to do so. I’m definitely the rebel of the family ( not reckless, just like to play devil’s advocate). I feel like a lot of ppl in relationships have settled with someone because of an unfortunate circumstance or because they are just scared to be alone. It also breaks my heart seeing extremely intelligent classmates end up in unfortunate circumstances. I expected so much from them. I just absolutely hate seeing people not live up to their full potential.
8) I’m a modern traditionalist. Yes monogamy is the ultimate goal. Yes I want to get married, yes I want a kid (keyword “a”, 1, uno), and yes I want the white pickett fence, long, 20-something yr marriage I’ve seen my parents on both sides have, BUT we live in a different time!
I’m a modern traditionalist in the sense that I think a woman should be submissive to her husband, but only if he deserves it. I think the man should be the head of the household, but if family crisis arises, the woman should be capable of stepping up to help instead of crying and watching things crumble.
In that same sense, as I said, I want to be married, but I do not believe a woman needs to be married in her 20s. If I don’t get proposed to before I’m 30, I won’t die!
Also, I don’t believe a woman has to conceive early in her 20s to have a healthy pregnancy. I don’t even want a kid until I’m around 29, and I only say 29, because again society and doctors have this theory that having kids after your 20s causes complications.
They need to re-evaluate that theory. Most people who choose to further their education aren’t finished with school until their mid 20s. After that they have student loans to pay in an economy where jobs are limited; let’s not forget the population is around 3 women to 1 man. With that being said, you’re dealing with financial problems, and difficulty finding “the one” within a host of young men who think they are entitled to side pieces, solely based on population ratio.
Women are getting smarter and working harder. What women 20 yrs go put up with, women today aren’t having it.
So back to my point. You have doctors and society pressuring you to have a baby/get married before 30, yet you are just learning the round abouts of life in your mid 20s.
Realistically, only a handful are lucky to have it all by then, and by have it all I mean the dream job, husband (ring and papers to clarify), kid, white picket fence, etc. by 30. The rest have settled. I rather die solo than be the rest. Sad right? It’s ok, I’m judging you equally.
Disclaimer: I think relationships are awesome, and an awesome relationship in your 20s where you both have it together is a rare blessing, just do not feel the need to judge someone who decides to focus their attention elsewhere at that point in their life. Times have changed. To each its own.