8 Reasons I’m Single & you Should Mind Your Business.

 

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I felt like this post was much needed. I have a birthday coming up, and you know when you start getting older your parents and people in general go from “You’re not ready to date” to “When exactly are you going to start dating?” Annoying to the highest extent.

Below are 8 reasons I  am single and don’t mind one bit; cross my heart.

1) I’m in my 20s. I don’t have to be committed if I don’t want to be. Stop interrogating me.

2) I’m purposely not approachable to the opposite sex. Calm your tits, I’m straight as a pin. I purposely set my demeanor as unavailable because I’m genuinely not looking. If love finds me, then damnit, but I do not go to singles gatherings, hesitant to give out my number/ go on casual dates, and I don’t read into compliments. I take them platonically and keep it pushing.

3) Just landed the perfect job for a free spirit in their 20s. I just got hired as a flight attendant, however I haven’t received my official wings yet, until I pass training. I don’t want any distractions. I lose focus easily in relationships. Also I’m going to be doing a ton of traveling and I have trust issues. Lastly, I don’t want to feel used for traveling perks. I’m already starting to feel used and I’m not even official yet.

4) I never wanted to get married in my 20s. EVER. I will however accept a proposal if God happens to plan my life that way, and everything feels right. Other than that, I am not interested in heavy commitment in my 20s.

5) I’m a late bloomer. Some of the things some of you were doing at 16, I wasn’t until 19, 20. Let me continue to take my time please.

6) If I commit young I will rebel. I know if I causally glide through my youth, then at 30 I would have little “what-ifs”. I will be able to dedicate my time fully to my husband and family. My mom, although beyond awesome, got pregnant with me at 16, had me at 17, got married at 19 and so I watched her dishearteningly try to relive her 20s .

7) To prove a point. My mom was married at 19, my stepmom at 24, and my brother at 19., all for a common reason (a kid). I don’t fall into that category, so why tie myself to someone if I don’t necessarily have to. I have the whole rest of my life to do so. I’m definitely the rebel of the family ( not reckless, just like to play devil’s advocate). I feel like a lot of ppl in relationships have settled with someone because of an unfortunate circumstance or because they are just scared to be alone. It also breaks my heart seeing extremely intelligent classmates end up in unfortunate circumstances. I expected so much from them. I just absolutely hate seeing  people not live up to their full potential.

8) I’m a modern traditionalist. Yes monogamy is the ultimate goal. Yes I want to get married, yes I want a kid (keyword “a”, 1, uno), and yes I want the white pickett fence, long, 20-something yr marriage I’ve seen my parents on both sides have, BUT we live in a different time!

I’m a modern traditionalist in the sense that I think a woman should be submissive to her husband, but only if he deserves it. I think the man should be the head of the household, but if family crisis arises, the woman should be capable of stepping up to help instead of crying and watching things crumble.

In that same sense, as I said, I want to be married, but I do not believe a woman needs to be married in her 20s. If I don’t get proposed to before I’m 30, I won’t die!

Also, I don’t believe a woman has to conceive early in her 20s to have a healthy pregnancy. I don’t even want a kid until I’m around 29, and I only say 29, because again society and doctors have this theory that having kids after your 20s causes complications.

They need to re-evaluate that theory. Most people who choose to further their education aren’t finished with school until their mid 20s. After that they have student loans to pay in an economy where jobs are limited; let’s not forget the population is around 3 women to 1 man. With that being said, you’re dealing with financial problems, and difficulty finding “the one” within a host of young men who think they are entitled to side pieces, solely based on population ratio.

Women are getting smarter and working harder. What women 20 yrs go put up with, women today aren’t having it.

So back to my point. You have doctors and society pressuring you to have a baby/get married before 30, yet you are just learning the round abouts of life in your  mid 20s.

Realistically, only a handful are lucky to have it all by then, and by have it all I mean the dream job, husband (ring and papers to clarify), kid, white picket fence, etc. by 30. The rest have settled. I rather die solo than be the rest. Sad right? It’s ok, I’m judging you equally.

Disclaimer: I think relationships are awesome, and an awesome relationship in your 20s where you both have it together is a rare blessing, just do not feel the need to judge someone who decides to focus their attention elsewhere at that point in their life. Times have changed. To each its own.

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The Cost of Youth. Laser Tattoo Removal

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Today I started the process of removing two of my tattoos.

Before I got those tattoos, I did indeed consider the future, but I wasn’t sure of the profession I would land. I felt however, that I could easily just cover them with makeup.

Covering them with make-up for conservative settings like my internship, interviews etc, did work because they are quite tiny, but it became tiresome.

Reason for removal

When I fell in love with the idea of wanting to become a flight attendant, I knew I had to get them removed. I hesitated because landing a flight attendant job is a process of its own, because of how competitive the application process is.

I didn’t know how long it would take, or if I would even be successful in being selected by an airline.

When I got my job offer, I panicked under my overly joyous demeanor.

Tattoo removal is not done overnight, or with just one appointment. It is a long, painful, extremely expensive process.

Today I went to my first appointment at Dr. Tattoff’s office here in Atlanta.

Cost

The cost for removing each tattoo, combined for every treatment was almost 1,000 per tattoo.

The receptionist liked me, and so she gave me a great deal, which realistically is still pretty costly. She charged me $967 for both tattoos combined.

The $967 includes 9 treatments, everything included (after care treatment, numbing, etc.). If my tattoos do not disappear by 9 treatments, she said they would continue free of charge. If it took less treatments, I would be reimbursed accordingly.

They factor your cost based on skin tone, size of tattoo, shading vs outline, color of tattoo, etc.

They have a chart consisting of 5 skintones:

1) Pale/ Porcelain

2)Fair

3) Olive

4) Brown

5) Dark

Three, four and 5 being ethnic skintones, 4 and 5 being mostly African American/Hispanic. She listed me a 4.

Black ink tattoos are the easiest to treat, pink , purple and green and pastels are generally the most difficult. Mine are both black ink.

Outlines and smaller tattoos are also of course easier. Both of mine are only 1 inch/less.

Pain

The pain was not as bad as I thought. It felt the same to me as getting the tattoo.  They numb you a little, but I decided to do it without getting numbed because I was in a hurry. You will feel some sort of pain whether or not you choose to get numbed.

She spent less than 5 minutes zapping each tattoo, and it was over.

It smelt like burned flesh and my skin was on fire, but she had cool air blowing out of a nozzle the whole time on the areas. The room was also freezing.

Also keep in mind that ethnic skintones cannot be treated as aggressively with laser as pale and fair skin can. It runs a high risk of hyper and hypo pigmentation.

This really is a downer because this means double the amount of treatments.

Concerns

Getting frustrated with the process is my biggest concern. Also the cost really is depressing. It basically cost the same as say a boob job if she didn’t give me a discount. (Natural boobs btw 🙂 Don’t need one, lol).

Also I fly out for training at the end of October. My training lasts 3 weeks, yet my next appointment is November 7th. If you don’t show up to your appointment without notice, they charge your card a $25 fee.

I’m worried I would not be able to make treatment dates, which are 7 weeks apart. I really wish they were 4 weeks apart, like some other places.

Also, Dr. Tattoff is only located in Atlanta, Beverly Hills, and 3 other places she listed, but none of them are one of my flight attendant base choices, which means I will have to fly home every 7 weeks for treatment.

I have high hopes my treatments wouldn’t take as long as she estimated.

I’m going to ask her to treat them more aggressively the next appointment. I rather have a scar than the tattoos at this point. If I was white, I would have only needed 4 treatments.

Final thoughts

Please consider your future entirely, and intelligently when making a decision to get a tattoo on a certain location of your body.

I still love tattoos, and I see nothing wrong with them. I am extremely artistically inclined and see them as a way of expression. However, location definitely matters, unless you plan to live all aspects of your life free-spiritedly, including your profession.

I will continue to cover them and submitt paperwork to my airline, until they are completely gone. The thought that my skin would be renewed to a new canvas in a matter of months is quite liberating.

 

NW43??? Summer Fling With MAC

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color in average non-artificial lighting
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color in no lighting (see the reddish, orangish undertone)

 

Decided to purchase MAC Studio Fix, because I couldn’t believe how cheap it was. Twenty -seven dollars for a compact? In New York?

My NARS powder I got from Sephora cost $50 in Times Square ($45 online), so I was very impressed with MAC’s prices.

I don’t wear foundation that much in the summer, but my cousin went to MAC to get some for herself, and as I said, I just couldn’t help myself.

Now my Winter shade in Sephora is Tahoe. Tahoe has a yellow, and faint pinkish undertone. It matches my skin perfectly in the Winter. Here is a link: http://www.sephora.com/powder-foundation-spf-12-P125408?skuId=1226422. The color is described as “med/dark with caramel undetones”.

However, in the summer, it is a little too light. I can easily blend it and still wear it, but my biggest pet peeve is seeing women wearing “too light foundation”..even a tin-git too light.

I researched the equivalent color of Tahoe to MAC’s shades, and a not so reliable online source stated it was an NC43.

I had never in my life saw an NC43, so I took that answer with a grain of salt.

I told the MUA in MAC what I was told the equivalent to Tahoe is. She immediately looked at my skin and said, “No. NW43 maybe. You have combination undertone. You have reds and yellows in your skin, so your best bet is going with an NW shade.”

NO! I didn’t want to be NW. My Tahoe is definitely a yellow based powder, and the NW MAC compacts looked red clayish.

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She told me my undertone will appear more red in the summer and more yellow in the winter. She was so right. My skintone is extremely warm, and I’ve always noticed one undertone being more dominant, depending on the weather/season.

I opened the NC43 and it was way too light. Like an olive person’s skin tone. That online source was so wrong!

NC43-> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dKQ3qaOI9LQ

NC45 was too dark.

She told me I looked like an NW43. I was still not happy about getting a red based powder, but I agreed to try it on.

She also brought a C7 powder, for me to try (I have no clue what that stands for).

She applied the C7 to the left side of my face, and the NW43 to the right side, and as clear as daylight, the NW43 was a perfect match. The C7 was ok, but not like the NW43.

I bought it, but still didn’t feel confident, especially knowing I have combination undertone, and that I was going to have to switch powders every season, and not just switch shades, but switch brands.

MAC probably doesn’t have my Winter shade in the studio fix. An NC43 would still be way too light in the Winter, and an NW43 would be too red based, since my yellow undertones protrude when it gets cold out.

I actually love the finish of this studio fix compact. I also obviously love the price.

This NW43 compact will probably last me forever since I only wear a thin layer, and can only wear it in the summer and summer is almost over.

Just felt like venting about my high maintenance, combination skin (lol).

Advice: DO NOT SEARCH YOUTUBE AND GOOGLE AS A RELIABLE SOURCE TO FIND YOUR SHADE. MOST PEOPLE ON THERE WEAR THE WRONG ONE. GO TO A STORE AND TRY IT ON.

She isn’t an NW43 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q_rsOs7CE9w

Neither is she https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xcdTFCrIS

The only person I could find that seems to be a true NW43 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WQGIWBytGt8

 

Day 3: Good Morning Crooklyn. Last Day in NYC.

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Today is my last day in NY. My flight back to Atlanta is scheduled for noon tomorrow.

I don’t know what I’m doing today. My cousin will be at work all day, and i have to either figure out NY solo, or starve.

I’m on my way to attempt riding the train to 42nd st, Manhattan to get lunch, do some site seeing, picture taking, and maybe text my guy friend I met.

Hopefully I get to hang out with him if he gets off work early.

Not ready to leave, but ready to get back to Atlanta to my own bed, and working toward pursuing my goals.

NY and Emirates were just the first step.

I’ve jokingly said I am unavailable for three years (dating wise). Three years is the length of a flight attendant’s contract. I am honestly just focused on this one career move at the moment, and I don’t want anything, including my feelings getting in the way of that.

I am young, single, educated, no children, or ties at the moment. I am exploring life and loving it.

After-all, it’s hard to cuff a girl who wants to be flight attendant 😉

 

“You’re in love with something bigger than love.

You believe in something stronger than trust”

                                                             – Wanderlust.

Day 2: The Sheraton Manhattan. Interview with Emirates

 

 

 

 

Dust Yourself Off And Try Again

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I didn’t grow up dreaming to be a flight attendant nor did I go to college with hopes of becoming one.

After all to be a flight attendant, one simply needs the passion, personality, customer service skills, and a high school diploma. Experience and degrees are perks.

I have all of the above. I believe I exceed the requirements also.

I started looking into be an FA after graduating college and figuring out myself better. I looked at the upsides and downsides of the job and still found myself being passionate about it.

I feel like even if I don’t get a base pay to do it, I still would. That’s when I knew.

I playfully applied to a sophisticated and highly rated airline, Emirates.

About a month later I received an email saying my application was short listed and I didn’t have to attend an open house day. I was bumped to the assessment day interview.

Excited I prepped night and day for the interview. I used every resource out there. The more research I did on the job, the more I wanted to become an FA.

 

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Fast forward to Sunday, August 24th, 2014. Today is the day.

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My interview began at 9am sharp at The Sheraton New York in Manhattan.

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I rode the train from Brooklyn for an hour, having to transfer trains in between stops.

I couldn’t eat breakfast. My stomach was doing flips. I wasn’t nervous, but ready.

I felt extremely prepared. I had done tons of research, knew the airline, their policies, what they were looking for, their dress code, approved hair styles, everything verbatim.

I was the only girl in the room with a khaki blazer to imitate the Emirates khaki blazer. I also put my hair in a bun (1 of their 3 approved hairstyles), had French tip nails (again 1 of their 3 approved nail grooming options), dyed my hair one color, black (which never happens), etc.

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I smiled the whole time, until it hurt, and still continued, as the author of the holy grail bible for flight attendants, Kiki Ward suggested.

I interacted with everyone around me, and actually naturally conversed with the other candidates.

We were all nervous, and basically felt the same way. I met 5 other people who flew in from Atlanta, which relaxed me a lot more, seeing a piece of “home”.

We basically had to fill out paperwork, then hand in our resumes, portraits, and invitation to the recruiter one by one. I totally was not expecting just 1 recruiter. I was hoping for a panel.

After that we watched videos of the airline, got a paper with information about our work schedule, pay, time manageability, life in Dubai, etc.

She then asked questions, I raised my hand and answered one.

She then looked at me and looked around the room and started speaking about the Emirates reach test, and how we had to be able to reach 6’9, 212cm on bare feet because their aircrafts are one of the largest.

I kept looking at her smiling. She kept emphasing that if we know we can’t reach this, then it’s best to get up and leave now. I comfortably kept my 5’2 stature seated and continued looking at her smiling. None of the other shorter girls got up to leave, and she wasn’t going to break me.

I practiced the reach test at home tons of times before coming. I marked 212cm off on my wall and thank God for long arms and swimming lessons from 6-12yrs old that I’m able to stretch my arms and torso farther than average.

I patiently waited to take the reach test. I wasn’t nervous.

She then decided we weren’t going to take the reach test until after eliminations.

She told us to go on break for an hour and she will match our resumes with our pictures and appearance today.

Anyone with mini skirts, tight skirts, stiletto 5 inch heels, jeans, visible tattoos and piercings, etc would be eliminated.

Again I felt very confident. I had come prepared. My resume and picture were the least of my worries.

My resume was formatted to mimic a flight attendant’s resume, except with my information, skills, awards, etc on there.

I have the personality, experience, and requirements needed to be the perfect match for the position. I’ve been flying since I was 2 as an unaccompanied minor, I have dual citizenship, I’m used to moving, being the new girl, adapting to new cultures and people; I’ve worked in Public Relations. I have a degree in Communications, all of my other jobs have been in customer service. I’m artsy, I like to blog, travel. I’m extremely empathetic, intuitive, analytical (all great for understanding the needs of others). I was a member of the Children Youth Red Cross when I was younger. I have welcoming eyes, nice teeth and smile, quiet confidence, team-oriented. Why wouldn’t she pick me?

After an hour on break, having genuine fun hanging out with the other candidates, we nervously rushed to the wall where 4 pages were pinned. The four pages had around 20 names and only around 7 on each page were highlighted.

We made a single line to check to see if our name was highlighted.

The people who already checked either had big smiles and ran into the room where the ones that made it had to go, or walked past the line of us waiting to view our name, crying/ sad that they didn’t make it.

I started praying as I waited in line and saw the different emotions from the people ahead of me.

I told God that I wouldn’t be angry. If my name isn’t highlighted, then that means he’s trying to tell me that Emirates isn’t the airline for me, and I wouldn’t dare question him, just continue to keep it moving. After all, there was nothing I think I could’ve done better. I gave it my all.

I got to the wall and looked on all of the pages. My sight felt hysterical and blurry.

At first I could even find the paper I signed my name on. I calmed myself down, took a deep breath and searched from the last page to the first page, because I knew I had signed my name on the first page since I was one of the firsts to arrive.

I searched the first page last and found my name. It wasn’t highlighted. I checked again and turned to two of the people I was hanging out with; a Russian girl and another girl from Atlanta. They had both made it and they felt I was cheated.

I simply hugged them big and wished them the best.

I called my cousin and told her my journey for this airline had ended and asked for directions back to the apartment.

I had never ridden the subway alone in New York, but I was sort of zoned out and just wanted to get bk as fast as I could.

I didn’t even take off my heels. I exited the Sheraton, and took off into the busy streets looking for the train station.

I didn’t sit once on the train ride back. I stood against the pole, still zoned out, thinking about what had just happened.

Everyone on the train and on the streets were staring at me with my popping red lips, a big, low, donut bun, scarf and heels.

This one Italian guy on the street asked if I was an Emirates flight attendant. I in-genuinely smiled and said no.

I got home and had to explain to a lot of people, which I ignored until I came to terms with the situation myself.

Later that night I cried for a mere 3 minutes, dried my eyes and felt re-energized.

I reminded myself that this is a “dust yourself off and try again” industry.

It is an audition type of job. Flight attendants are DEFINITELY not just waitresses in the sky.

This job requires you to be able to save lives. Your coworkers and yourself are the only ones in the air that people have to depend on if something goes wrong with the aircraft.

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There are many steps to earning your wings. It isn’t the typical 1 interview/ 1 step job. After auditing you still have to go through training for a number of weeks, take around 26 safety, emergency, medical, airport and city codes, military time, etc exams and score a 90 and above on all to pass.

It’s a lot of work for many people, but if it’s something you really want to do and know it fits you perfectly, then it wouldn’t bother you.

I’ll be back in Atlanta Wednesday morning. I have another audition on September 3rd, and also applying to more airlines.

I still mark this first audition a success. It was a learning experience.

I appreciate everyone who supports me, and even the ones who don’t.

I have a friend or two that have turned their noses up at the fact that I have a degree, yet want to be a flight attendant.

I’ve also come across people in the industry that haven’t responded to referring me, but all I need are my skills, God and the support of family, which I’ve attained.

I’m excited that I know exactly what I want to do for now and proud of myself for hustling for it. I have to really be moved by something for prissy me to to “hustle” lol 🙂

I wish the girls who make it to the very end the best! My only regret is not exchanging numbers. The situation really forces you to unexpectedly bond with other candidates in a short period of time.

We are all working at the same goal. To get those shiny wings.

Your office view is the world! 🌎 Imagine that ❤️

Blogger in Brooklyn: Day 1

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Just got to NYC earlier today. First time staying in Brooklyn. Feels like I’m in the local downtown of a Caribbean island to be honest.
Crown Heights is set up weirdly. It’s considered the hood. Crown heights is filled with immigrants.

Everyone in Crown Heights has a Caribbean accent. Around the corner (still in Crown Heights) there is the Jewish community with large mansions.

Real life Jewish men walk the streets in black and white conservative attire on a casual day with large brimmed fedoras and a full, trademark beard. Like a t.v show for real lol.

Everything you could ever need in Brooklyn is in walking distance.

I’ve never seen so many Caribbean restaurants and beauty supply stores on the same stretch before.

Caribbean flags dominate any other decoration. Trini flags, Jamaican ones, Guyanese ones, Haitian ones, St. Vincent, Puerto Rican ones, etc parading in the wind attached to vehicles.

I had a roti at Ally’s on Utica and drank homemade sorrel. Tomorrow I’m going back for pholourie and more sorrel.

Tonight I might be going to a Guyanese BBQ. Hopefully my phone doesn’t die so I can continue to blueprint my adventures.

Looks like I’m here a weekend too early. Next weekend is Labor Day in Brooklyn, which means it’s gonna heightened times two.

Oh. I’m here for 4 days.

Tomorrow morning at 9p.m I have my first flight attendant audition with Emirates.

I call it an audition because..

..well stay tuned for day 2. I’ll explain.

Ttyl
❤️

Guyanese BBQ in Queens

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Whenever someone from NY says we’re going to a BBQ (Korean BBQ, or any other ethnicity’s BBQ) translate that to block party.

The invite is also non inclusive. Last night at the Guyanese BBQ, everyone from young adults, moms, dads, grandparents, & children with no bedtime were at this block party.

The food was basically a hefty variation of what Caribbean people typically cook: macaroni pie, potato salad, stewed chicken, jerk chicken,stewed beef, oxtail, roti, yellow rice, curry, plantains, etc; lots of liquor, soca/dancehall music/ east coast hip hop (eg: biggie, Jay-z).

No one was shy about dancing. I have grandmas/ grandpas recorded that we’re getting down to the music.

If you’re not dancing you’re labeled “stiff”. No one wants to be labeled “stiff”. I didn’t care though. I acted too cute to get raunchy per usual.

Oh. I met a cutie there; a light-skinned, Guyanese, baby faced, cutie, on the edgy side, but looks “too cute to be a rough neck” kind of guy that you don’t usually date or take home to dad, but you have fun with short term, because he’s cute and treats you like you’re 10x more intelligent than you are. Yea, those are my standards when I’m NOT looking 😏

I’ve playfully saved him in my phone as “Brooklyn Bae”. Oh gosh, when did I start embracing that

I’m probably going to keep my promise and text him to hang out before I leave Wednesday.

Having a ball with life. You’ll die taking it too seriously. Maybe it’s an age phase thing, who knows.

Lost My Virginity Today at “The Brow Nook”

photo 2 Today I got my eyebrows threaded for the first time! Agh! 🙂 I love them!

I found a girly little spot located on Forsyth Street downtown Atlanta, tucked around the corner of Quiznos and the U.S post office.

The location is extremely convenient to people who work in the heart of downtown and Georgia State students (1 min from Aderhold). There are countless restaurants nearby, the Five Points transit station, etc.

The name of the place is called The Brow Nook and the interior design will draw any girly girl in. The walls, furniture and rug are different shades of pink, with black lining. I believe there is some pink and black zebra pattern around the mirrors, soft, white comfortable chairs; it’s just beautiful.

I wanted to take pictures of the inside, but forgot, and was too scared to go back and just start snapping.

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The setting reminded me of something you would see in the movie “Legally Blonde”; proof that looking past the begging bums and stench of downtown, there are hidden treasures.

I paid $9. That is their standard cost for eyebrow threading.

She threaded my eyebrows in literally less than 5 minutes. I was blown away, especially because my eyebrows were unshapely, thick, and needed a lot of work, since I rarely get my brows professionally done, and I had been growing them out for weeks.

She simply made the remark “Long time huh?” lol.

When she was done I asked if she could thread my whole face, but she told me I didn’t need it, and that only East Indian people who are hairy like herself ever come to get that done.

I laughed, thinking to myself, “I am hairy. I’m Trini. Half of my ancestors are YOUR PEOPLE.” LOL.

Anyway, below are the results on a naked face. I plan on being a hooked and faithful customer.

I hope that next time my eyebrows are sculpted even better, eventually until they match almost perfectly!

I know eyebrows are supposed to be sisters, but you can manipulate them into being twins, right?

I am now obsessed with eyebrows!

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Naked face. No eyebrow filling/lining.

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